I have been thinking a lot about you lately. When I'm out in society, especially at work, I see all sorts of examples of mothers and what their daughters are becoming. As I am not yet a mother of a daughter, it naturally leads me to think about you because I am interested in the types of girls my son will have associations with.
We as women really have a responsibility to leave a legacy in our children. What type of legacy are you leaving in your daughter? Will she grow up strong and confident, knowing she is worthwhile and beautiful or have you instilled in her insecurity and fear that will cause problems in her future relationships? I know she will have the agency to make her own choices, but what kind of teachings does she have at her core?
The other day at work I saw a mother and a daughter in the line next to mine and was concerned. The daughter was proceeding to pull up her short shorts up to make them even shorter. She even checked to make sure they were just barely low enough to not actually show her butt. All the while her mother stood right next to her, looking in the opposite direction, appearing oblivious to her daughter's actions. Women need to teach their daughters that wearing revealing clothing is not required to be beautiful. In fact, it often times can attract the wrong type of men who will help them have issues thinking they are beautiful. Is see so many women at work who feel the need to show it all off in an effort to be beautiful. There are enough women like this in the world.
Recently I saw the following video:
This video makes me wonder what your daughter thinks it means to do thinks "like a girl." Does she know that just because she is a girl that she doesn't have to diminish herself, act ditsy and dumb, and not do things to the best of her ability? This one is a hard one for me because this is a big problem. You may have been taught wrong what is means to be a girl and this will have rubbed off of your daughter. Or maybe you were taught right or decided to break a cycle and your daughter knows what it is like to be a strong and powerful female who can do whatever she wants. Girls need to be taught that just because they are a girl does not mean that they cannot do things well. Phrases like "you throw like a girl" need to be deleted from our speech because it should only be that I do things like me and to the best of my ability.
And please consider the message of this next video when you teach your daughter about her relationship with the world.
Does she know that she does not need to apologize when she didn't do something wrong? Women are very quick to apologize and to take all the blame in every situation, even when there is no blame at all. She does not have to apologize for having an opinion and being a contributing member of society. She does not have to apologize for being who she is and she definitely doesn't have to apologize because she thinks she is getting in the way of others. The one and only time she needs to apologize is if she actually did something wrong.
Someday I hope to be the mother of a daughter and to have the ability to teach her not only what is morally right and wrong but also what is right and wrong with being a woman. Until that day when I have that opportunity, I can only think about you and hope that you are teaching your daughter to become the kind of girl I want my son to marry.
Sincerely,
The Mother of Your Daughter's Future Husband
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